It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
