FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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