after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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