I wannas sexs uuuuu
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
