I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
