I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
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I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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