If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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