i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
