Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
