I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Is her dick bigger than yours?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
