When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
