i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He felt like a one man threesome
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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