i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
