he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
