the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Randomize
