Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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