I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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