it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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