Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
