My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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