i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
