I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
