Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
