She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Oh god it's open bar.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
why is half of my head shaved?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
