somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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