you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
