Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I want to make a zoo with you.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
