Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
