wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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