New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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