Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
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