weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just found puke in my bra..
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Randomize
