Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
