I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
