it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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