So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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