If that was your dad, he is hot
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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