We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
