I've blown a few things in my day
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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