Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
