Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
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