Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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