I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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