I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
