You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
God, I missed his penis.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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