At least make sure they are 18
Why
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
