I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
