in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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