so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
