White coat. Heels.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
